Dreams In Floss Colors

Reinventing Myself...Again

2005-10-09T15:01:00.000-04:00

You knew it was about to happen.

The Black Cat of the Family

Hope to see you there.:)

Sigh

2005-09-29T10:04:00.000-04:00

Things were just zipping along great, until this morning.

This morning sucks. And it's my fault.

Sorry for the sad post. Wish it could have been cheerier.

Is It Friday Yet?

2005-09-13T08:21:00.000-04:00

Warning: this is a fly-by-the-seats kind of post, so you may or may not know what I'm talking about. That's okay, for I rarely know myself...

Sometimes I just want to give up.

My husband and I are working on my art site, so I can put my artwork out there and really promote it. I will be offering prints for sale, and a few special items, and last week I was really excited about this venture. But now?

Harumph.

I don't think I can do this. I don't think I have the drive, the stamina, or the grit to really give this a go. And, to top it off, I'm too sensitive. The pure cynicist in me says it's just not going to happen. The sensible one within me wants to slap the cynicist upside the head and tell it to shut up, that I'm just being stupid.

And I know I am.

The truth is, I was afraid of this when I started painting again. I get too involved in my paintings, too attached. When a painting is not liked or appreciated, I take it as a personal rejection, because that painting is a part of me. This is not a good attitude for a artist to have, and if cornered on it I will deny I said it until the day I die.

And now for the guilt: some people right now have nothing, and I have everything. That makes my pity-party all the more insidious.

sigh. I think I need to go back to caffeine. This decaffeinated stuff just isn't worth it's salt sometimes.

Still here...

2005-08-30T15:47:00.000-04:00

...and still kickin'! I've been doing a lot of artwork and trying to get my art site going again. I've had an amazing financial blessing, which has answered a lot of prayers.

As soon as I get my art site back up I will be transefering this journal to it, so I'll keep you posted.

In the meantime, I've been surfing the net today for a picture of Sean Bean for a friend who wanted to know who he was. I found something rather interesting, and I thought I would post it for your viewing pleasure:

Mr. (Sean) Bean:

Enjoy!

Arrghhh Yahoo!

2005-08-02T10:10:00.000-04:00

What a week.

Due to financial circumstances (which are, fortunately, turning around in our favor) I had to switch my art site from its premium service to non-premium status. Well, what did Yahoo do? They cancelled the whole shebang! That's right, apparently there is no option to actually downgrade; once you cancel the premium service, the whole site goes dead. Needless to say, I now find myself without my art site.

:::: double heavy sigh ::::

There was a *lot* of work in that site. I was even getting ready to offer prints for sale, and now nothing nada zip. I have put most of the stuff I consider presentable on my devianART gallery (which now takes the place in my "Artist" link in the site bar), but you cannot advertise prints from your gallery. What I might have to do is take one of my old Blogger blogs and convert it to a sort of warehouse where I can offer prints of the artwork.

Right now, however, my main focus is to get painting! I've finished some cross stitch designs for Dinky-Dyes, so my next goal is to finish some of these WIP paintings I have lying about. I'm itching to get back to oils, which is my favortie medium. Due to the fact that I have two young children and no art studio, most of my oil painting will have to be done at night after they are in bed. Trust me--young kiddos and oils do not mix!

Later, gators. Off to finish the Dinky Dyes models and get creative...

Just Checkin' In

2005-07-25T23:25:00.000-04:00

Still here. Still around. Still doing my thang, you know, that thang I do. I just have not fell a whole lot like blogging. I've had a whole lot to say, but I've made up my mind to be a battery-charger instead of a battery-drainer.

Be back soon!

Zaftig Incorporated

2005-07-13T08:44:00.000-04:00

I've been trying to get back on my eating and exercise plan, but it's been hard going. I do not seem to have the motivation I once had. There was a time last year when losing weight was the most important thing for me, and my focus was razor sharp. After the situation with David, however, that seemed like a very silly goal. All I cared about was getting my son back, and once he returned I realized the only thing that is truly important is our love and the time spent with each other.

Well, we are rounding (ha) out a year since that whole ordeal, and I'm ready to start losing weight again (albeit, not so obsessively). I just can't seem to get traction. My determination is not what it once was, even though I really do need to shed a few pounds (well, more than a few, but we won't get into particulars).

Of course, having seditary hobbies doesn't help either: painting and stitching do not exactly raise the heart rate and burn calories. Well, that may not exactly be true; I know some stitchers who stitch so fast their needles burn holes in the fabric. Perhaps they push themselves because they know something I don't. Can one's metabolism be affected by the speed of one's needle, or perhaps the friction of one's paint brush?

Hm. I'm going to begin work on a new painting, so perhaps I'll find out...

mah mood:fat

Don't Worry: Be Happy

2005-07-12T11:17:00.000-04:00

Okay, what's with people? Can somebody answer me that? On my Yahoo profile, I specifically state that I am "happily married, so no flirt attempts, thankyouverymuch". Well, it seems that all I seem to get on my Yahoo Messenger is nothing but flirt attempts!

Let's see, I've had come ons from RogerInRome, someone called Married40Guy, some Thomassomethingorother, and various other sad pick up lines from sundry Yahoo messengers. Do these people not know how to read? I'm as much for conversation as the next person, but c'mon! If I wanted to flirt, I would have said "Happily married, and yes! please! flirting welcomed!"

It's not even as if my profile picture is even that sexy. As a matter of fact, it's pretty durn plain and straigtforward.

Behold the newly crowned Sweetheart of Yahoo IM:

Real hot, huh? Me in all my middle-aged glory, donning glasses, a sweatshirt, and holding our dear late cat. Yessiree, makes me think flirt material, how 'bout you?

One of my best friends swears it's *because* I'm so adament about being happily married that is bringing them out in droves, but I have my doubts. My husband, of course, thinks the picture of me is incredibly dishy, but he happens to be insanely in love with the woman in there, so that does not do much for his partiality. If it was a picture of Catherine Zeta-Jones or Liv Tyler, then perhaps I could see throwing caution to the wind and ignoring such "no flirting" signs, but I am not either of those women, nor anything near them, so I just don't get it.

Color me baffled. Perhaps this is one of life's little mysteries that will never be solved.

I had an entire post about depression, overly-sensitivity, blame laying, blah blah blah but I decided to nix it. I don't want to weigh down my day with depressing things.

I will say, however, that I've heard that depression is incurable. This may or may not be true, but I certainly do not have to entertain those things that make me depressed.

And neither should you. Only you have control over your emotions, and you can choose to be a hurt, miserable person or not. As for me? I choose freedom from hurt. Whether it is hurt caused by others or myself, I alone can give it the power to control me. I may slip back into unhealthy emotional habits from time to time, but I will continue to fight them. I will not succumb.

Don't live with grudges, folks. Don't allow yourself to live with pain and bitterness. Life is too short, and you are all too precious to live beneath joy and happiness.

Mah mood:determined

Updated Profile

2005-07-08T14:18:00.000-04:00

Yes, I know this is riviting information for all of you Gentle Readers, but I just spent the past 15 minutes uploading a picture to my Blogger profile and trying to get the homepage link switched from Fully Caffeinated to Dreams In Floss Colors. For whatever reason, Blogger refuses to allow the switch to happen.

Hmm. Mayhaps I should have stayed at Fully Caffeinated in the first place.

Oh, well, never fear...I'll get it worked out somehow. The weird thing is that it is not even listing any posts from this current blog, but ones from older blogs. If I was a total 'puter geek I might be able to go in and whiz bang slam dunk the whole shebang, but as it is I'm a total lighweight in the ways of Computer Formatting (if that even has anything to do with my problem, which I'm betting it doesn't).

Oh, well. For those of you interested to see the pic I put on my profile, I'll spare you having to hunt for it and just post it here:

As you can see, it's still me. Nothing fancy, nothing special, just me raw faced and bespeckled. And I know you can't tell, but I'm wearing my customary bare feet and long skirt, and the rest of my fashion staples: no makeup, long hair, comfortable shirt, and a smile.

Hey, what can I say...I've done the all-make-up-fashion-plate thing. Betcha didn't know I used to be a professional make-up artist, now did you? Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt, and now it's just me and the face God gave me saying Hello, nice to meet you.

Now I'm off to figure out how to link to my Blogger profile so one can actually read what I spent the last 15 minutes updating...

Mah mood:nerdy

Pay Attention, Folks: It's A Wig.

2005-07-07T14:34:00.000-04:00

Okay, this is to all those film critics who claim to have such an eye for fine film detail, thus warranting them to review the afore-mentioned medium:

Didn't you people get that the Phantom was wearing a *wig*, hence the dramatic hair color change during his unveiling? Duh!! Did you people, like, *miss* the part where he is smoothing his hands over his wig as he prepares for his final performance?

Ah, I see...you must have been out getting popcorn. Of course.

sigh.

Hey, I don't have a problem with someone griping about something in a movie, but at least gripe about something that actually warrants griping about. The sudden change in the Phantom's hair color would, indeed, be something worth mentioning if he didn't wear a wig the majority of the time which, of course, he does.

I can see film bloggers, now armed with this new information, flying to cover their embarrassing blunder, hoping no one who actually paid attention to the film read their review.

P.S. Erin has not as yet made a review of the film, but as always I am interested to see what she has to say.

Buh Blah

2005-07-07T11:50:00.000-04:00

Blah. Blah blah blah. Buh blah buh blah, buh blah blah blah. Buh buh buh, blah blah blah. Buh blah. Buh blee blah blah, blee blah blah blah. Buh blah hah.

blee blah:wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee

early morning musings

2005-07-06T08:01:00.000-04:00

Over the past few weeks I have given serious thought to retiring this blog, as I have felt myself becoming more and more private. For some reason, I am going through a sensitive, raw stage regarding my emotions, and blogging was becoming a point of stress for me. I've been keeping an online journal since 2001, and as many of you know I change journals and blogs like I change moods; i.e. far too frequently. There has been a lot of misunderstandings behind the scenes on my personal front as well as on the internet front, and I am weary. Whatever decision I tend to make, it upsets someone I care about and regardless of how innocent I may be, I am left holding the bag. I want to discuss many more things than I do in this blog, but I am afraid it would be too raw; not necessarily for the readers, but for myself. On further inspection, however, I have decided that my blog is what it is, and I enjoy it, regardless of its content. Whether the subjects be frivilous, deep, or somewhere in between, it is my own little space to hammer out my inner workings and curiosities. In spite of it all, I have come to enjoy it and I am going to be around for some time to come. Ergo, my blog will stay.

Besides, I'm Southern, and we Southerners just love to talk. It doesn't matter if it's to others or ourselves, just as long as there is an audience. And, for those who have accused me of talking to myself far more than is healthy, I know God so I am never really talking to myself, I'm really praying. So there.

In stitching news, I have revamped my stitching rotation -- again! -- and I'm very happy with it. In light of yesterday's Phantom post yesterday, I have two pieces I'm going to "Phatom-ize": Mirabilia's The Kiss and Rose of Sharon. For the Kiss, I'm going to pale up the gown even more to mimic the gown Christine wore for the Masquerade scene. The man will get a slight hair cut and will don a half-mask, as well as a black doublet. The roses will all be red, with the bouquet donning black ribbons. I think I will stitch this on a silvery-gray fabric, with silver beads instead of the blue clouds for the sky. I would love to add a candlelabra or two, but that may be a bit too amitious. For Rose of Sharon, I am going to transform her gown to a similar one Christine wore in the "Don Juan" scene, with a crimson bodice and a skirt in frothy, aged lace. This will be a bit tricky, but I think I can do it.

In art news, Ellen Million has given the Enchanted Artists a sample shot of the cover of the Atlantis collaboration. Here it is:

These will be available soon for purchase through Ellen Million Graphics, so be sure and get your copy! It is filled with amazing artwork from some very talented, very dedicated artists.
Here is a re-cap of my entry:

I guess all I can say is that you are not in Kansas, anymore kiddos. Welcome to Atlantis.:)

mah mood:water drinking camel

The Phantom of Holly Street

2005-07-05T11:54:00.000-04:00

I have just spent the past 72 hours emmersing myself in not only one but two different Phantom of the Opera soundtracks, and then going back to compare them by watching the 2004 film version. Through all this, I have come to this conclusion:

Michael Crawford may sing better than Gerald Butler, but if I had been Christine I would have left Raoul high and dry in the graveyard in favor of Butler's Phantom. Okay, so he would have to change the murderous streak and the bouts of freakish insanity, but c'mon...can a man possibly ooze any more passion?

On a personal note, it was like watching my husband on film. Robert is a dark, passionate soul whose desires inflame me. Fortunately, he is born again and does not cater to the "keep your hands at the level of your eyes" kind of aggression, of which I am most grateful. He even shares my interest in this particular production and he enjoys discussing it with me. As we were watching the end of the sword fight between Raoul and the Phantom, he turned to me and said, "You know, if I was Raoul and you told me to spare him, I would be like, 'Stacey! After all he put you through, how can you say that?" I calmly responded, "My dear, that would not have been an issue for you would have been the one lying in the snow." He didn't get it, but my mother-in-law did and howled with laughter.

What can I say? I married my romantic hero; thick dark hair, eyes so dark they blaze black, skin that can tan under a 40 watt bulb, and a genius intellegence that never ceases to amaze me. Yes, the bouts of moodiness drives me nuts, but he is a complete package that completely thrills me. I am a fortunate woman, indeed.

Fortunately, he feels the same way about me. I think more marriages could weather the storms better if the husbands and wives were genuinely nuts about each other.

::::::::: runs off to send hubby an e-mail which humming "All I Ask Of You" ::::::::::::::

Mah Mood:romantic

Independence Day

2005-07-04T17:30:00.000-04:00

The guys knew how to say it all.

Happy independence Day, everyone. May God bless the U.S.A.

Mah Mood:thankful

A Promise

2005-06-30T13:12:00.000-04:00

I went to ladies prayer this morning, and it was incredible. The group was small, but each of us have a burden for the church at large. We prayed for there to be a release of the fear and depression that grips so many women today, and we also prayed for a return to virtue (i.e. "moral excellence". There is such a misunderstanding about what that word means today, but that is a subject for another entry).

While praying, God gave me a tongues and interpretation (1 Corinthians 12:10) for the ladies. It was incredible, and it has been a while since I've allowed that gift to operate (my own lack of self-confidence, but that is a subject for another entry). God basically told up not to fear, to look to His face and trust in Him. He gave us this promise that He would is always here for us. It sounds so simple and mundane as I write it, and there was so much more that He said; to coin a cliche', you just had to be there. It gave me hope and encouragement that I have not felt in a long time. He is still here, hearing my prayers, wanting me to stand on the rock of His Word, and trust Him.

He also said something that stands out to me beyond all else: He said to look neither left nor right, but to look straight ahead and seek His eyes. Well, considering my attention has been veering all over the place, I was quite - oh, what is the word - illuminated to hear that message. I took it for me, as I should have. It's one thing to think the things of God are always for others, and quite another to realize it's for you, as well as for somebody else. It's fascinating.

His ways are truly marveolus. People enjoy poking fun at Christians in general (and some of it is meant in a harmless manner, I realize that), but mainly because they don't understand what the Bible is really about. I can say there will be some surprised faces come that day of the 'catching away'. I think a lot of questions will be answered on that day, as well as a lot of questions formed. All I know is that I won't be here to answer them then, so I'll do my best to answer them here and now as best I can. I may not be a scholar, but I can read and I love God; the rest will follow as it will.

Seems ezboard is not the only one weirding out...

2005-06-29T21:59:00.000-04:00

...but Blogger seems to be following its footsteps. Can you see that hay-uge gap between last entry's title and post? Sheesh! And mine isn't the only blog who remains scathed, so I think it's a Blogger boo-boo.

Hi, folks. I'm back today, and doing much better. I've spent more time in prayer, more time speaking in tongues, (yes, I am one of "those", and if you have no clue what I'm talking about read the Biblical book of Acts and it will answer your questions), and more reading of the Word. I've been hungering for the Bible more lately than I have in a long time, and that makes my heart glad. While I suffer with depression, I am determined to stay drug-free and fight it.

I've been reading over the stitching blogs, and I came across Terri's six project rotation. I have no idea how I've missed this, for I love the concept. The most difficult thing for me now is to choose six projects from my current WIP list and stick with them until at least one is finished before moving on. Of course, I may have to use this new rotation method as an excuse to start several new projects to serve as my six, ha ha ha; Ever fickle am I when it comes to stitching.

Sooooo, after careful deliberation, here is my new six project rotation:

1) Flaming June
2) Fox Knot (I've recently gone crazy for foxes, go figure)
3) Scent of Old Roses
4) Lady of Shallot
5) Gaelic Banner
6) Celtic Arwen ( a LOTR conversion of Celtic Christmas)

There! Thank you, Terri, for such a great plan; I only hope I can finally stick with something.

I'm actually excited. I feel like now I have a goal to meet rather than just floundering around with my stitching. I'm even going to brave the front and list all of my WIPs in my signature line, and not just the ones I'm working on. I think that will help keep me honest.

Well, gotta run...it's nearly 10 PM and all this stitch talk has left me itching to actually go and stitch!

Mah mood:much improved

A Tired Morning

2005-06-27T09:36:00.000-04:00

My depression is getting worse.

Some days are better than others. Today is not a good day. Yesterday was not a good day. Saturday was better, because I got to spend it with the Georgia Ghetto Floss Lickers at Val's Get Together. It was quite a merry jaunt, and I had a great time. I may even be able to host one myself in the fall, but we shall see.

Today, however, I am back feeling depressed. I don't know what to do. Part of it is my mood: one minute I'll read something and be deliriously happy, and the next I'll read something else and be miserable. It's the pits. I've always been this way, but it's been kind of bad lately.

A lot of it is spiritual attacks, I'm convinced. The more a person hungers for God's Word, the more the enemy flings his fiery darts. Blech. Oh, well...I've read the end of the Book, and I know how the devil gets it in the end. No worries.

As far as the internet community goes, I have tried my best to be the encouraging one for people. I have tried to tread softly, speaking my mind in peace. I have flaked out a couple of times and let my temper set the pace, but I've always publicly apologized when I was wrong. I've tried my best to fit in, but lately I have felt so alien. I don't know why. I just don't know why. I feel like I'm on the outside looking in. I've never quite felt this way before, so it's a new experience for me. I don't bring this to the boards, because I've seen people get backlashed before for "complaining" too much, and I certainly don't want anyone to think I'm complaining. I'm truly not; I'm just trying to muddle through my thoughts.

I actually feel bad for you, the readers, because in the past I've been light and border-line comedic in my entries. I've had some deep ones, I know, but things were more "up" at Fully Caffeinated. I just can't do that right now. I wish I could, but there is just too much gravity within me.

Keep praying for me. I can sure use the prayers.

The Waiting...

2005-06-23T08:23:00.000-04:00

...is the hardest part, or so saith Tom Petty aka One of the Weirdest Men In Rock Music.

Alas, there is a bit of truth to that statement, at least if you are me. I sent off an order of charts for Heaven and Earth Designs, and I've been haunting my inbox ever since (proof that I'm not just one of their artists, but also one of their patrons! What can I say...I'm hooked).

Hah. I'm pathetic. Here I am, checking my inbox literally every half hour. Yeesh, as if I don't have enough to stitch.

But I don't care! I want Flaming June! I have to start Touch of Frost now! I need all of the Stephanie Pui-Mun Laws! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaahh!!

It's a good thing I'm going to ladies prayer this morning. I think I need to pray for a little more patience in my life...

Well, it looks like I'm not going to make it to prayer meeting this morning after all. To be honest, I just can't get the motivation. For some reason, mornings are very difficult for me. I have a hard time "pressing through". It's as if my body does not switch on until after 12 pm, and the fact that I've switched to decaffeinated coffee isn't seeming to help much. Sigh. One of these days I'll get myself together.

At least I'll be able to get housework done and bills paid. I have lately had a bone-crushing fear at paying the bills, probably because we have so much debt, and because of that fear I will procrastinate paying, which makes things worse. Last night Pastor Waldron preached on fear (Revelation 21:5-8), and it completely convicted me. I have the Holy Ghost, so why do I fear these things? In the natural, it is truly silly. Although I still feel the emotion, I am praying this morning that God will deliver me through these anxieties. Until then, I just have to bite the bullet and face my fears, such as bills, head on. The Scripture "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me" applies to just that; all things.

My stitching is going pretty good, but I'm in "stash organizing" mode. I have quite a bit more to do, and I wish some of the Georgia stitchers lived closer to me; I could really use the help!

I've narrowed down my rotation, and I will be working on the following projects over the next year:

TWs Fall Carousel Horse
HAED's Cats
Mirabilia's Enchanted Dreamer
Mirabilia's Autumn Maiden
L & L's Celtic Arwen (which is really Celtic Christmas as my Arwen conversion)
HAED's Got Fairy?
Chatelaine's Weeping Willow Keep
Mirabilia's Scent of Old Roses
Long Dog Samplers St. Flovier
HAED's Fox Knot (provided I can find the floss key!)
HAED's Flaming June
Dracolair's Gaelic Banner

I may add some more, but I think if I stick with these I'll have enough to keep me busy for the next ten years or more. On the other hand, I think David and Jessi will both be ready for college when I get through this rotation.

Oh, well. There's nothing better than having goals, I suppose.

mah mood:waiting in anticipation...

aaAAAAArrrrrrGGGGGGGGGGgggggggggHHH!

2005-06-22T14:26:00.000-04:00

Methinks my mind is about to become long gone after dealing with the ezboard issue. I have re-opened my board, transfered a goodly amount of posts, made a big hoopla-production over how we are OPEN! OPEN! OPEN! only to have posts fall once more off the face of the earth.

sigh.

Thank the good Lord there are three of us to deal with this mess. What would I do without Dana and Angi? Dana's technical skills and sweetness takes such wonderful care of us, and Angi manages the community chest and is our resident diplomat. Me, I just barely entertain the masses; it's Dana and Angi that are capable of doing all the hard stuff. I guess instead of "Head Fae" my title should be "Head Fluff". Grr.

Ah, that letsfeelsorryforourselves is starting to creep in. Well, too bad, I'm just frustrated that I can't get more of this ezboard mess sorted out! And my board members have to suffer for it. Although, to their emmense credit, they are the most patient, "go-with-the-flow" crowd I've ever had the pleasure to know.

I think I'll go take an Advil and mope. Or better yet, I'll fondle some stash; that always cheers me up.

mah mood:frustrated

Random List of Thoughts

2005-06-21T15:19:00.000-04:00

As swollen clouds gather in a darkening sky, random thoughts flit across my mind like lazy butterflies. Some of them are deep, some of them are shallow, and some of them are just plain stupid; but they are mine, and mine nonetheless.

I've been thinking a lot about the media lately, and how I don't believe one word I hear. Well, that's not exactly true; I get sucked into their nonsense the same as anybody else, but I really shouldn't. When my son disappeared last year, I heard all kinds of tidbits about us in the news, and many of them were incredibly wrong. We even heard of some things people had been known to say about us, such as "I heard dat dee mama was on drugs" or "Yeah, I saw the daddy outside drunk on da front porch de udder night". Ye-haw. Couple that with the fact that we "cut off all communication with the media" as reported by Channel 2 news, and you have a real suspect looking couple.

I don't think reporting the news is about reporting truth anymore...I think it's about how sensationalistic one can be. If it truly was about reporting the truth, Dan Rather would have been kicked out on his rather wealthy senior citizen buttocks with no exceptions. What a doozie that one was!

But I digress.

It's starting to thunder again, so I need to shut off the computer for a while. We only have one right now due to mine being on the frizt, so I don't want this one to have a meltdown.

Later, gators.

mah mood:snoozy

Anything Goes

2005-06-17T10:16:00.000-04:00

Okay, today I'm in an "anything goes" kind of mood. This mood can only be explained by the incessant hole burned in my brain from one week of nothing but 24; we covered Season 1 and 2 in five days flat and are just starting Season 3. Due to the fact that while I am sleeping my mind tends to process my experiences from each day, Jack Bauer has literally become the man of my dreams.

Anyway, here are some random thoughts for the today:

1) I need sleep. Badly.

2) No matter how tired you get, it never rubs off on your children.

3) I spent about 30 minutes updating my bloggers list, not to mention reading snippets here and there. Bloggers are some of the most interesting people in the world; or at the very least, on the 'net.

4) I'm sure Condi Rice was surprised to find out that the Republican Party is just made up of Christian white boys (or so saith Howard Dean).

5) Now...on the deal with Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, I don't know if it's real or not, because I am not them and I do not know their hearts. I will, however, say this: you truly can have that kind of profound change and effect in your life with someone. It happened with me and my husband. The week after I met him, I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. We were inseparable, and to be totally honest we made freaks of ourselves, quite akin to Senor Cruise and Senorita Holmes. And here we are, still going strong after 10 years of marriage (and all that the word entails!). I have never been a Tom Cruise fan, but for the first time I find him interesting. Time will tell whether or not all of this is a 'publicity stunt', but I hope it's not; it's actually refreshing to see two people so insanely love with one another.

Mood: lovey-dovey
(and considering Tom Cruise's belief in Scientology, I find my little alien icon immensely appropriate)

"Welcome To Atlantis" - Finished!

2005-06-15T01:13:00.000-04:00

Roses are Red
Starfish are Bright
I've finally finished the painting
I'm exhausted
Good Night

Book project "Enchanted Artists Visions of Atlantis" Sumbmission:
"Welcome To Atlantis"

Mood: bushed

Elves With Testosterone

2005-06-12T00:23:00.000-04:00

I stopped by Herbal Planet yesterday, which is becoming a dangerous place to be because I always seem to spend money there. I picked up a box of India insence, four patchouli votives, and two roll-on scented oil bottles in the fragrances of "Lover's Moon" and "Rain Forest". The "Lover's Moon" is heavily reminiscient of Jasmine, while the "Rain Forest" is a greener version of "China Rain". I now smell so wonderful that even if I were as silent as the grave the Lothlorien elves would find me.

Well, Haldir, what are you waiting for? Oh, please, forget the heavy breathing dwarf, it's "Lover's Moon", for cryin' out loud! And no, don't send Legolas...I like to be escorted by eleves with testosterone, hello hello!

Yes, yes, I realize I may be offending Legolas lovers across the globe, so I say this: Legolas fans, please direct your hate mail to aloofelvenprincess@peterjack$oni$richrichrich.com. Thank yew.

Just got back from the hospital not too long ago. We just discovered hubby has an abscess near his tonsils that needed lancing. Nasty stuff, that. He is now drugged up on painkillers and antibiotics and snoring soundly in the next room. We have to go back to the doctor's tomorrow to make sure the nasty thing is not filling back up with pus; if it is, then it's surgery for permanent removal. Oh, ick!

On another less important if not as depressing note, it seems I've dropped off more than a few blogrolls over the past few months. Why that is, I have no earthly idea, but I guess I've chessesd some people off somehow. Considering I take extreme pains to behave myself and *not* cheese people off, I don't understand this. Yes, I admit I'm shallow enough to care about being on blogrolls I was previously on; so sue me. I just hate not knowing why I was once there and then gone. And I'm not talking about this new one, I'm talking about Fully Caffeinated.

Oh well...whatever. I'll get over it. Just not as soon as I like.

On a similar, I see in myself a trend to change blogs about once a year, and it's really not fair to expect people to keep changing their blogrolls, so over the next week I am going to develop a sort of "mothership" site with links to everything I have on the net: blogs, artwork, links, the whole deal. That way, whenever I change over blogs, no one will have to update their blogrolls because the mothership site will already be there. Clear as mud?

Gad. It's been a horrible day. My mind is fuzzy, I need a nap.
Mood: unloved

They're Here!

2005-06-11T23:48:00.000-04:00

It's finally happened! The event I have been waiting for over the past few weeks has finally come to pass, and I'm as happy as Fat Albert at an all-you-can-eat buffet at Long Horn's.

Yes, my friends, it's true: the fireflies have arrived! Huzzah!!!

Now, you must understand: I despise Georgia summers. 'Hate' is too kind of a word to describe what I feel for the sweat and outrageous electric bills that accompany this obnoxiously hot and humid season. Besides the heat, other delights that come in with the heat are spawns of revulsion hiding in the guises of cockroaches and gnats (although the gnats seem to form a demarcation line just south of Perry, but up here we get dem roaches big!). However, inspite of all this unpleasantness, the one amazing thing that embarkens on Georgia summers are the mysterious and enchanting fireflies.

Have you ever seen one? Up close, I mean; they are rather funky, if silly, looking bugs. I am actually known not to freak out when I hold one, quite unlike the squeamish creature I become when faced with any other type bug (save for butterflies and dragonflies, even if the latter do weird me out a bit). Ah, but if you've never seen them in full lighted action, then you are missing something magical indeed! They are like lighted snowflakes, tiny stars that have fallen to the ground and taken refuge in forests. They shimmer, they shine, they blink in and out, erratic Christmas lights that flit from one place to another. Another name for the firefly is 'fairy lights', and rightfully so; we once had some old friends visiting us from Britian, and their children had never seen fireflies before. They were enchanted, and swore that they were surrounded by fairies.

Yes, indeed...tis the time of the firefly!

I first discovered this fact last night as I was leaving my niece's 16th birthday party. It was raining, and just starting to get a little dark. As I got my children buckled and snug safely in the mini-van, I noticed a twinkle out of the corner of my eye. I turned, and as I gazed into the forest I saw them: hundreds of little twinkling stars, sparkling here and there. I was so thrilled I leaned back my head and shouted, "Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! FIREFLIES!". I have no idea if anyone heard me, but I stood there in the rain for about five minutes and just watched them, transfixed. The moment that would make the approaching sticky summer worth it had finally arrived, and I was savoring every minute of it.

Every night around 8 PM will find me haunting my front yard, humming in my porch swing and sipping my hazlenut decaf java, watching the fireflies play. They make the summer worth it, and that's all that matters.

Watched more of 24: Season 1 today. Jack Bauer, you da man!

Mood: kickin' terrorists booties

Highlights and Lowlights

2005-06-10T20:19:00.000-04:00

Here are some of my highlights and lowlights from the past 12 hours:

1)Serious snuggle time with my formerly diahretic black cat, Julius.

2)Got sucked into the intense-fest known as 24 and actually purchased Season 1 (by the way, Glenn Beck owes me 50 bucks for getting me hooked on this crazy show in the first place).

3)Realized Kiefer Sutherland is still as totally cute as I remember him from his Lost Boys days, even though he is now old enough to play the father of a teenaged daughter (wow, do I ever feel old!).

4)Felt my eyes bleed at learning about the complete insanity of the movement that turns Jesus into a "Judith" in the new, 'Now-Woman-Can-Finally-Relate' Bible.

5)Had a moment where I threw my organic-fat-free-sugar-free diet to the wind and slurped blissfully on a huge Coffee Mocha shake from Steak 'N' Shake; make that a double cheeseburger, hold the onions, triple the fries.

6)After 20 years of complete indifference, Tom Cruise is finally interesting to me.

7)God, really does know better than me.

8)Life is good.

9)So are chocolate cupcakes loaded with frosting and overstuffed with ooey-gooey filling. Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet.

10)The ezboard hack is really giving me a headache.

11)It is a complete and total drag when my husband is sick.

12)I am hopelessly hooked on essential oils. I see a future for me in aromatherapy.

And, also included in today's entry is Stacey's Top 5 Boo-Hoo Song Fest:

# 05: "Under The Blood" by Vicky Yo'he
# 04: "When You Believe" by Sally Dwarsky and Michelle Pfieffer (from the original 'Prince of Egypt' Soundtrack.
# 03: ""Unchained Melody" by The Righteous Brothers
# 02: "Annie's Song" by John Denver
and the Number One song in Stacey's Boo-Hoo Song Fest is:

drumroll please

# 01: "Into the West" by Annie Lennox.

The ladder will send me into vocalizing at the top of my lungs and squaling my eyes out.

Back in May I got tagged by several wonderful bloggers. I am ashamed to admit I was not keeping up with my blog at the time, so I am woefully behind on any tagging but I hope to rectify the situation. So, here it is - better late than never:

Choose 5 and complete the sentence and then tag 3 other bloggers...

If I could be a scientist . . .
If I could be a farmer . . .
If I could be a musician . . .
If I could be a doctor . . .
If I could be a painter . . .
If I could be a gardener . . .
If I could be a missionary . . .
If I could be a chef . . .
If I could be an architect . . .
If I could be a linguist . . .
If I could be a psychologist . . .
If I could be a librarian . . .
If I could be an athlete . . .
If I could be a lawyer . . .
If I could be an inn-keeper . . .
If I could be a professor . . .
If I could be a writer . . .
If I could be a llama-rider . . .
If I could be a bonnie pirate . . .
If I could be an astronaut . . .
If I could be a world famous blogger . . .
If I could be a justice on any one court in the world . . .
If I could be married to any current famous political figure . . .

Hmm...
If I could be an scientist, I would create a space suit that would enable astronauts to leave the spacecraft and fly safely around the stars.

If I could be an astronaut, I would don said space suit and swim in the stars, touching as many as I could. I would hover abover above the moon and cry at its beauty.

If I could be a doctor I would pray to find a cure for cancer.

If I could be a librarian I would choose to work in a quaint little library in a cozy, homegrown town and devour as many books as I could.

If I could be an athlete I would be a figure-skater, those beauties that are elegance on ice.

And, due to my tardiness, everyone else has already been tagged so I guess I complete the ring.

Ta da!

Mood: nerdy

Feeling Rather Green Today...

2005-06-10T09:02:00.000-04:00

...but at least it's not around the gills.

Good morning, Freaky Dahlings! I am up with the birds, so to speak, and enjoying a cup of wonderful organic-grown decaf-coffee loaded with fat-free creamer, Splenda of the Kroger brand variety, and sugar-free caramel syrup. Yu-hum!

Ah, but I remember the days of pure caffeinated bliss! I still succumb to fully-loaded java, but unfortunately I can't have as much of it as I wish. It has been wreaking some pretty serious havoc on my system lately. While I can tolerate the caffeine in sodas, the jam-packed coffee variety has to go.

Well, at least for a while; just try to keep me from a Starbucks during my next Barnes & Noble trip! You'll draw back a nub.

I've started re-reading one of my favorite on line journals, Aries Moon. Lucy is a very interesting personality, and after reading her journal for so many years I almost feel like I know her. She was the main reason I took the plunge into on line journaling. I've had several journals (now defunct), and the more recent blogs Perle Moon and, of course, Fully Caffeinated and Armed with Chocolate. While Lucy maintained the same diary for six years, I have noticed within myself that I change mine every year (or more, as the case has been of late). I don't necessarily feel like I outgrow them, but more or less they outgrow me. Each journal takes on a personality of its own, and when I can't "keep up" with that personality, I move on to one that suits me better at the time. Of course, the truth is that I'm probably waaaaaaaaaay over-analyzing all of this, but so what...it's my journal and I'll over-analyze if I want to.

Moving on: When Lucy closed shop on Aries Moon, I was pretty heart broken. Okay, I thought, what am I going to read now? Fortunately, the on line world of blogging and journaling has virtually exploded and there are a gazillion items to read out there, many of which are in the stitching and artist communities alone. However, imagine my delight to discover Lucy has created a new journal, Les Listes d'Athenais, of which I am nearly two years too late. Oh well...better late than never, no?

Well, I'm now off to drink more caramel-flavored decaf and tinker in some more over-analyzing. Have fun, y'all.

Mood:thoughtful

The Walk of A Thousand Miles...

2005-06-09T09:05:00.000-04:00

...begins with a first step. Of course, some days I feel like I'm taking that first step backwards.

I'm incredibly tired this morning. David got up some time last night and pillaged the fridge again; popsicles, my soy peanut butter chocolate frozen dessert, cheese slices, apples, and even the eggs - although, fortunately, he didn't actually do anything with the eggs. This all stems from the fact that lately he refuses to eat anything during the day except peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, of which he has two for dinner last night and *still* went pillaging. Big Huge Le Sigh. I just don't know what to do about it sometimes. I can't make the child eat during the day, but I'm not going to have him scouring the fridge during the wee hours of the night, either.

It's times like this when mothers should get a huge medal for braving Unknown Territory.

In other life news, I organized some of my stitching last night and I found my old WIP Enchanted Dreamer by Mirabilia. I do not have a whole lot stitched on it, but I had forgotten how much I enjoyed working on this piece. The colors are bold yet soft at the same time, and working on it soothes my spirit. I had to rekit some of the Kreiniks I had originally added, but it is now sitting snug in my q-snaps waiting for me to resume stitching on it. I hope to be able to do so this afternoon.

Of course, I can't really focus on my stitching until my Atlantis submission is finished. Ellen Million Graphics is putting together a book about Atlantis, and is accepting submissions from artists at the Enchanted Artists board. Fortunately, I believe I will be able to make the deadline.

Here is what I have so far:

I was going to call it "The Oceanid's Grotto", but now I've changed the title to simply "Welcome to Atlantis". I have more done on it than this, but my scanner is not currently hooked up to my husband's computer so this is all I am able to share. I hope to finish the piece tonight, or at the very least finish most of it.

Right now I am going to the ladies prayer meeting at my church. I am tired and have a beastly headache, but it's times that like when I need to go all the more.

Mood: artistic

Dreams

2005-06-07T09:55:00.000-04:00

To live, to love, perchance even to dream; these are the things stars are made of...

I have been envisioning a life for me lately of love, security, and peace. Perhaps if the next few weeks were not going to be filled with insecurity and doubt, I would not be clinging to the idea of the former so much.

*sigh*

The Good Lord never promised that our lives would be problem-free. He only promised us a tunnel from which to travel through the problems. Do we make it through unscathed? Never, for the situations in our lives effect us always. Many times for the better, sometimes for the worse, but we are always effected.

It's what causes growth. What we choose to do with that growth is our own choice; I will choose to cling to God and let Him be my shelter.

I've been very reflective lately on where I've been and where I am going. I've also been nurturing a desire to get back to basics and more in touch with that which is natural. I do not know if it's my inner-treehugger begging to be unleashed (although not an environmentalist I do consider myself a conservationalist), but the word for the day during my last grocery visit was 'organic'. Organic coffee, organic pasta, organic cereal, organic olive oil, soy milk and ice cream...the list goes on and on. I cannot realistically buy everything organic, for I simply have not the means (i.e. limitation of products and funds, for this stuff is expensive!). I will try to get what I can, for I find that quality should not be scrapped where there is a way to get it. I'm even slowly phasing out my parrafin candles for soy candles when I can, as well as bath products. Although there are still some synthetic fragrances I wear, I am drawn more to the natural essential oils to perfume my body. Neroli and patchouli are my favorties, but I found a lovely rose oil I am saving my pennies for during my next trip to Herbal Planet. I have even dug out my insence burner and have scented the home with the sweet smell of Shoyeido's "Golden Pavillion".

And no, I do not own a tie-dye, nor do I have a shrine erected for the late Jerry Garcia. I do, however, go bare-faced and bare-foot.

While part of me is screaming, "latent-hippie!" the other part is simply acknowledging my desire to simplify my life. I have a long way to go, but part of that plan involved somes serious spring space clearing. It will probably take me one whole month to clear out every tiny nook and cranny in my home (I'm in no way a slob, but I have collected a lot of treasures over the years), but I'm willing to do it. There is so much stuff hanging around, and many of them contain memories that have long gone stale. I do not want to surround myself with anything that is not beautiful or useful, or in some way does not enrich my life. Part of this is the reason for this new blog; Fully Caffeinated served its purpose for me during that phase of my life, but it ceased to reflect me a little while ago. Instead of giving up writing altogether, I felt it would benefit me more to simply have a go at a change.

I hope you choose to join me on this new journey of mine. I do not know where it will lead, but with God's grace it will lead me to new and exciting places, and ultimately to that wonderful place of peace. As long as I'm by His side, I don't see how anything different could happen.

May peace be the journey!